Setsuna’s Route

In Setsuna’s route, Haruki talks to Setsuna over the phone a few days after the hotel incident. First he apologizes for what he did, and then he tells her the truth: that he hasn’t forgotten about Kazusa, but that he also loves Setsuna. She argues he shouldn’t apologize, that it was her who had acted in a terrible way [1] and that he shouldn’t talk to an awful girl like her. [2] The call though lifts Setsuna’s spirits and, by the time they’ve finished talking, Takeya and Io are already celebrating that Haruki has said he loves Setsuna. [3] Yet, in the following days, nothing happens between Haruki and Setsuna because neither of them contact each other. Io has a talk with Setsuna, and asks what the problem is explaining that she’s always been the one on the offensive. [4] Setsuna explains to Io that she’s scared. [5] She had been the one to lead Haruki to the hotel and done something terrible afterwards, and now she doesn’t understand how he could still like her. [6] She had been chasing after him for so long [7] that now that he doesn’t run away, she doesn’t know what to do. She’s both afraid and worried that she’ll fail yet again and end up hurting him, and herself, even more. [8]


[1] No, actually, I’m the one who’s unfair… I’m the one who did all those terrible things.
[2] Why would you want to talk to a terrible girl like me…? You’re so weird, Haruki-kun…
[3] Screw it all, we’ll be drinking until morning now, got it? Man, she’s such a waste on you!
[4] Even though you were on the offense so many times before? What’s the problem now…
[5] I’m scared…
[6] That’s why I don’t understand it… Of course he should be mad. Of course he should hate me for it. So why is he…
[7] What I can do is chase after him when he’s running away from me.
[8] I’m worried that I’ll fail once again… That we’ll be hurt even worse than before… Then my legs just refuse to move.

The problem, she explains, is that when she’s with Haruki she becomes delusional and actually believes he can be hers alone. [9] Even though Io argues that it is not a delusion, Setsuna insists it is and that she doesn’t believe he will ever forget about Kazusa. [10] This is what happened back at the hotel. As soon as she realized it, her body instinctively refused him [11] and subsequently she assumed he shouldn’t have any reason to like her anymore. [12] Io wants to know if it’s enough for her to be friends with him and asks if she’ll still be able to smile when he starts talking to them about his wife and kids. [13] This forces a horrified gasp from Setsuna and Io tells her that if her reaction is so shocking, even when talking about the situation hypothetically, [14][15] then, if she doesn’t get a hold of herself, her wish will never be granted. Later, Io and Takeya, talk to Haruki questioning him as to whether he’s contacted Setsuna since the time he called her in front of them. [16] But Haruki reveals that he hasn’t tried to contact Setsuna. [17] Io then reminds him that, despite his unfaithfulness and terrible behavior, Setsuna hasn’t given up on him for the past three years [18] and that she deserves better.


[9] I thought that, maybe, he could become mine alone… or something similarly delusional.
[10] No, it’s a delusion for sure. Haruki-kun will never forget about Kazusa.
[11] When I realized that, my body just instinctively refused him…
[12] That’s what happened during Christmas… Do you understand now? That’s why he shouldn’t have any reason to like me anymore.
[13] If you think that after Haruki gets a girlfriend, has a family and children, and talks to us about his family, you can still be there talking with a smile, that is.
[14] I’m just talking hypothetically, and look how shocked you are…
[15] Setsuna, you can only force yourself so far
[16] Hey, Haruki… Haven’t you tried to get in touch with Setsuna since that time?
[17] … That was the last of it. After that, I didn’t try calling or texting her.
[18] She hasn’t given up on the amazingly dense, unfaithful, terrible man that you are for the past three years now.

After a while, Setsuna meets Yanagihara Tomo, a girl who had gone to the same school as her. She’s surprised to see the new Setsuna, who is barely a shadow of who she used to be. When asked, Setsuna confesses she can no longer sing [19] and that she expects nothing from the future. Tomo is shocked that the once bright school idol has now fallen so low. [20] Who could have caused that? After deciding she should be having more fun, Tomo drags Setsuna with her against her will. They meet two men that hit on them and Tomo plays a prank on Setsuna by telling the men that she has to go, but that Setsuna will keep them company. After being led into their car, Setsuna starts shouting Haruki’s name and asking for help. [21]


[19] I can’t sing anymore.
[20] What is this… Are you really the Ogiso Setsuna I know? How can the woman I’ve never once defeated fall so low?
[21] Nooo! HELP ME! Haruki-kun! Haruki-kun!

Eventually, Tomo scares the men away. Once they are gone, Tomo inquires about the name of the boy she was shouting [22] because a rumor, saying that Haruki had dumped her, had been spread around the school. [23] Then Tomo realizes what has destroyed Setsuna, but utters in disbelief that, after three years, it’s unbelievable she’s still not over him [24] and something like that could have brought her to such a low point. [25] But on hearing those words, Setsuna explodes. How could Tomo dismiss it as unimportant by saying “something like that” [26] when she has no idea about what it is to suffer in a relationship. [27]


[22] Ah, speaking of which, I just remembered… The one you called just now was Haruki-kun.. wasn’t it
[23] Wasn’t he the one who dumped you three years ago? That rumor’s spread already, you know? Even in our generation.
[24] … Hey, what’s the matter? You still haven’t gotten over being dumped three years ago?
[25] That’s unbelievable… ‘The’ Ogiso Setsuna? All it takes is something like that is enough to bring you down?
[26] … What do you mean, ‘something like that’?
[27] You’ve been living like this, have you ever even suffered over a relationship?

Setsuna then goes on to reveal her suffering for the past three years. Her life had been boring [28] and without aspiration, one where she would just keep rejecting invitations from friends over and over again [29] and would also lie to her family about going on dates with Haruki. [30] She told how she would wear plain clothes, braid her hair and put on glasses to disguise herself. Although not someone who even liked to drink, most evenings she would get drunk and pretend her relationship with Haruki was going great. [31] For the past three years she had been thinking about just one person [32] and now that he had actually paid attention to her, she didn’t accept it and tells how she feels like she is going to lose her mind. Setsuna says that if Tomo hates her so much then she can just run her mouth off and tell everyone about who Setsuna Ogiso really is. Of course, Tomo doesn’t even consider telling anyone Setsuna’s story and declares that no one in their right mind would believe Setsuna had become so morose.


[28] These three years since I graduated from high school… I’ve been living such a boring everyday life.
[29] Going to university without any goal or aspiration, rejecting invitations from friends over and over again…
[30] That’s why, every now and then, I lie and tell everyone I’m going on a date, then go and watch a movie by myself…
[31] I endure the boredom and kill time until evening, drinking when I don’t even want to, going home drunk, pretending that our relationship is great…
[32] Just thinking about one person… I know it’s dark!

When Tomo and Setsuna part ways, Setsuna immediately calls Haruki. Though he answers the phone, this time Setsuna just keeps shouting and telling him that he’s an idiot over and over again. She tells him that another man had actually touched her just now and she asks if he’s jealous. [33] When he says he is, she calls him a liar because, in her mind at least, she can imagine his uncaring face and it makes her want to cry again. [34] But Setsuna was wrong, Haruki was truly jealous, and furious to the point of almost breaking the phone. Yet her anger just intensifies and she begins to shout about everything being his fault, about how he had tricked her, had betrayed her, and that was why she had become such a morose and disgusting girl. [35]


[33] Are you… jealous of that man?
[34] Liar… you’re saying that in such a light tone… Just imagining your uncaring face makes me want to cry again…
[35] Because you betrayed me, you tricked me… as a result, I became a gloomy and disgusting girl… you know?

Haruki realizes something must be done and, intending to calm her by playing his guitar, he tells her he’s going to hang up and call her back. This, however, causes Setsuna to get scared [36] and say that she doesn’t want him to hang up. While Haruki insists it will just take a moment, Setsuna assumes it will be like before and that he simply doesn’t want to speak to her. [37] For three years he would just turn his cell phone off or maybe even take the cable out of his home phone, [38] leading Setsuna to believe it will happen this time as well. Haruki tries desperately to reassure her and insists he will call her back several times, but the girl asks why she should believe him since he has always avoided her in the past [39][40] and again implores him not to hang up. [41][42][43] Eventually he does, but then calls her back immediately to play his guitar to her.


[36] !? Why!?
[37] You say that now, but the truth is, you won’t call back, right? … You don’t want to talk to me anymore, right?
[38] You’ll turn your cell phone off, then pull the wire out of your home phone…!
[39] How many times have you already betrayed me! Even though you’ve always avoided me, always kept your distance!
[40] I don’t believe you… I absolutely… absolutely… won’t hang up!
[41] Wait! Haruki-kun, wait…!?
[42] Uu… uu, uuu…
[43] Haruki-kun… Haruki-kun, Haruki-kun!

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The next morning, Setsuna goes to meet Haruki and apologizes for her behavior the previous night. [44] Haruki, however, believes it’s him who should apologize for his conduct over the past few years and explains that he wants to become a man who she can accept without fearing he will hurt her heart and tells her that he will change. Setsuna takes the opportunity to ask him to play the guitar [45] and implores him to let her hear him play every day. [46] Haruki is a bit concerned about the ‘every day’ part since he is a little out of practice, but Setsuna insists on it being every day [47] and states that she will be there during his practice as well. After Haruki promises he will, Setsuna says he absolutely has to do it and that the promise must be kept. [48]


[44] That was terrible of me… You didn’t do anything wrong, Haruki-kun, and yet I…
[45] Le, let… me hear it once again! Your guitar, Haruki-kun… please let me hear it again!
[46] It’s fine even if you’re not that great! It’s fine even if you miss notes! Just please, let me listen to you practice every day!
[47] Yes! Every day! Brag to me about how you improve slowly, but surely!
[48] You have to do it! It’s a promise right!?

Haruki does keep his promise and starts healing the wounds he has inflicted upon Setsuna. Nevertheless, things are still going a little too slowly and Takeya goes to talk with him because, as Io had told Haruki, it is his fault Setsuna has become a depressed and frightened girl who is suffering and only he can make the old Setsuna return. But Haruki keeps insisting to Takeya it should be Setsuna who takes the last step, explaining that, because he had made her suffer by avoiding her for three years, it’s only fair he waits now and for at least three years, because this is the same time he owes her. [49] Takeya argues that’s not the case, that it might work for him to wait for the same length of time, but for Setsuna it would be another three years on top of the original three. [50] Takeya is shocked that Haruki is actually thinking about making her wait for six years [51] to give her what she wants and remarks that he is doing it for his own sake, not Setsuna’s. [52]


[49] At least three years… Compared to the pain Setsuna has endured so far, that is the very least I can hold out.
[50] That might work for you… But to Setsuna-chan, it’s been three years on top of the original three, you know?
[51] You plan on making that girl wait for six years?
[52] It might sound like what you’re doing now is for her sake, but in reality…

A while later, Haruki asks Setsuna why she has stopped singing and wants to know if it’s true that she hates singing. Her response is that she does hate singing and she also informs him that she doesn’t want to sing ever again. [53] But, as Haruki keeps asking her questions, she finally confesses the truth, that she had actually decided to never sing again just so she could keep on loving him. [54]


[53] I hate singing. I don’t ever want to sing again.
[54] I started to hate singing just so that I could keep on loving you.

Her words, carrying the weight of three years, attack Haruki’s heart like knives [55] because Setsuna’s sacrifice was made for him. If she sings, everything that happened three years ago will come back to her. The first memories are fine, but the main problem, Setsuna explains, revolves around her 18th birthday, [56] the first time he betrayed her. [57] It is painful for her but Setsuna reveals that even if she tries to cover her ears or close her eyes to it, that particular memory still haunts her relentlessly. [58] The vision is so clear she can still see the snow from that day and she can still hear the excuses he had made. After that, of course, had come the graduation ceremony, [59] when Haruki had ignored Setsuna’s continuous phone calls and slept with Kazusa. Then, eventually, the proof of his betrayal was placed right in front of her when she had gone to say goodbye to Kazusa. If she began to sing again, Setsuna states, she might start disliking him and she might even come to hate him for what he did. [60] Because of all this, Setsuna decided to run away from reality and to continue pursuing him even if that meant destroying her own identity. [61]


[55] The MC’s words, carrying the weight of the ebb and flow of three years past, gouge at the emotions hidden in the deepest depths of my heart like knives.
[56] And then, finally… The birthday party from three years ago.
[57] The day… when I betrayed her.
[58] Even if I try to cover my ears or close my eyes… That memory still haunts me relentlessly…
[59] What happened during the graduation ceremony…
[60] If it goes on like that, I may start to dislike you… I may even come to hate you…
[61] In an attempt to run away, Setsuna has made a decision that’s tantamount to her destroying her own identity.

Haruki is shocked by this revelation and immediately apologizes to Setsuna. For him, she had made the decision to forget how to sing, how to smile and how to interact with other people. [62] Then Setsuna explains that she has done her best for him [63] and, after this, Haruki no longer hesitates, he makes up his mind to spend the rest of his life with Setsuna and to truly give his heart to her. A while later, he tells her he loves her and that she is the person he loves second most. On hearing these words, Setsuna’s face turns pale. [64] She starts anguishing about his reference to her being second and interprets that as meaning Kazusa is number one in his heart. [65] No matter how hard she tries, no matter how much time she spends with Haruki, Setsuna mumbles heartbroken, Kazusa will always be number one. [66] But then, Haruki states that the one he loves the most is the Setsuna who sings. [67]


[62] Forgetting how to sing, forgetting how to smile… and then, forgetting how to interact with people.
[63] I tried my best, you know? I tried my best to dislike singing just for you, you know?
[64] Setsuna’s flushed face turns pale in an instant.
[65] That, that means… I, I’m still… compared to Kazusa…
[66] I, I… not matter how hard I tried, no matter how long I waited by your side, even so, compared to Kazusa, I…
[67] Because… The one who I love the most, is the Setsuna who can happily sing in front of me.

Now Setsuna is, once again, able to sing. Together they perform a one-song concert at their university and it is loved by everyone. They are now a fully-fledged couple and, unlike three years ago, he truly chooses her. No longer is he indecisive, and this makes Setsuna sing even while kissing Haruki. [68] Amidst sobs, Setsuna apologizes to Haruki for how incredibly happy she is. [69][70][71] She cries, clings to his chest and tells him she had never been so happy before. [72] The next day, she repeats her claim of never before having been so happy in her entire life [73] and asks him to hold her so tight as if to break her. [74][75]


[68] Furthermore, she’s singing while we’re kissing.
[69] Uu… hic, uuu… Sorry, sorry, I’m very sorry…
[70] Be, because, I’m happy, I’m very happy…
[71] And I also embraced … and received Haruki kun’s love, I’m very happy…
[72] I’m very happy, it’s true. Up until now, I’ve never felt such strong feeling of happiness before.
[73] I’m very happy, you know? I’ve never felt such happiness since I was born, you know?
[74] … Hug me so hard as if you’re going to break me..
[75] That’s fine. Even if it’s painful, I won’t blame you. In a way, it’s a very ideal way to die.

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Setsuna also gets to make love to Haruki, something she’d been repeatedly fantasizing about for a very long time. [76][77] When Haruki hears this it prompts him to apologize to her. [78] She also wants to know if it’s his first time receiving oral sex, [79][80] which is rephrased in Haruki’s mind as to whether or not he already did this with Kazusa. [81] The fact that Setsuna gets to be his first, even if it’s just for that, makes her very happy. [82] During their time together making love, it turns out that Haruki also has some confessions to make. He explains that, for the last  three years, he has been masturbating while thinking about Setsuna. [83] He felt incredibly guilty about this because he had betrayed her in the past and that is the reason he’s been avoiding her even though he loved her. [84] This new revelation, however, doesn’t please her too much, as being avoided by him was much harder on her. [85] Haruki apologizes, but Setsuna still complains that it had been thousands of times more painful. [86] Now though, Haruki reassures her that he is with her, [87][88] and he intends not to leave her again.


[76] I used to dream about it… “One day I’ll do it with Haruki-kun.” I’ve been fantasizing about it again and again for a long time…
[77] I wanted to kiss you. I wanted to see you naked. I wanted to touch your body.
[78] I am… sorry.
[79] You’ve never done this with anyone else, right? I am the first, right?
[80] Yeah… So I wanted to do it as soon as possible. I wanted to be your first.
[81] But it seems this was the real Setsuna. “I’m the first, right?” “You did no such thing with Kazusa, right?”
[82] That… makes me happy. I am happy, Haruki-kun.
[83] I’ve done it by myself. While thinking of Setsuna. I always wanted to cry afterwards…. it felt so uncool.
[84] It was hard and painful… So, in order to avoid feeling this way, I avoided Setsuna…
[85] ! Being avoided by you was several times harder on me!
[86] It was thousands of times more painful…
[87] Haruki-kun… Haruki-kun, Haruki-kun… Harukui, kun…
[88] I’m right here, Setsuna…

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